Can you imagine you just had a baby at the age of 23, your getting ready to pack five weeks later to go over to the hamptons, and with in an hour you get somebody walking in the door telling you that one of the most important people in your life, the one you need most when having your first baby, the one you feel most comfortable with other then your husband of course has now passed in a horrific accident.
You fall to the floor, scream and instantly go blank, but before you go blank you feel your heart being ripped out. After that you completely shut down, not knowing how to live, where to go or even how to think everything is washed away, and your new life now begins.
2001 which was a year that many can not forget, I had an infant daughter had been married for two years, and was in my early twenties. The world became scary and with out a parent, no support, no family support, and no friends to talk too, not even a counselor at the time it was beyond what I could deal with.
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Coming to grips with my mothers loss was never easy and it took eight years to do so, we are no going on year thirteen and honestly I don't think I have fully healed I suppose no one ever does.
As I sat there holding my infant daughter, who will never get to know her grandmother but does have one picture of grandma holding her, I know i have years to cope before even my daughter understands what has happened during this tragic event, but where do I go from here.
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A tragic event taken place in South Carolina on a warm sunny day as my mother was driving, lost control and was killed instantly. She was only forty seven, and no other cars where involved.
I could sit here and tell you what my days where like, it is a dark road with no light and the end of the tunnel maybe its depression, maybe its loss, but I do know it was something. Something not everyone will understand, and something some of you will understand, but something I completely understand today, a tragic event which has altered my life!
